Pregnancy Thoughts (probably hormone-driven)

I realized just how hard it is to find time to write blog posts when you're a working adult with a family. Only now that I'm staying home due to the pregnancy is when I have time for writing again. And even then, my thoughts revolve around our baby most of the time (if I'm not concentrating on some work stuff). I think I just want to put some of my thoughts and feelings surrounding pregnancy and baby on paper, for the memories, you know. 

The decision to get a baby did not come out of the blue on a drunken night but was actually calculated very carefully by us. It might seem quite early in our relationship, but both Tobi and I were sure we're in for the long term, so once we started planning for my fellowship abroad in 4-5 years, it seemed apt to get that baby planning started, too. What can I say - we were rather lucky because the baby-making process succeeded on the first go. 😛So we became pregnant while still being invested in both of our workplaces, which certainly had an influence on how we handled the whole pregnancy. Under no circumstances did I want to become a full-time pregnant woman too soon, of this I was sure from the beginning on. As long as it was physically and legally possible, I wanted to continue working. And that's exactly what I did for the first seven months of pregnancy. Luckily, I wasn't pestered with nausea or fatigue. Even though flatulence and bloating were really uncomfortable, it wasn't bad enough for me to want to stay home. It wasn't until my back pain became more severe and walking was an every day torture that I finally listened to everybody else and decided to stay home 3 weeks earlier than the start of my maternity protection leave. 

And with staying home finally came the time I was able to really look forward to our baby. With my belly being huge and the growing discomforts impossible to ignore, the thoughts that we were about to have a little human being living with us very soon became more and more present. And no matter how often I hear the somber warnings of sleepless nights and extreme fatigue that might come with a crybaby, I can't help but to just feel genuine happiness and positive excitement. I guess it's the hormones. 

Now I'm in my 35th week, I'm starting to get swollen feet and symphysis pain, but what keeps me going is the prospect of holding our little man in my arms, having him become acquainted with Lucy, going on vacation with him, and really, seeing him being loved by his daddy, his grandparents, his aunts and uncles, which will make me love them even more. All in all, this baby is just going to be a bundle of love, and that's something I am willing to trade all physical discomforts for, no doubt about it. 

I actually want to write a little bit more, but time is running out. Hopefully, I can come back in a couple of months to write about how our little man will have actually changed our lives. Now I just can't wait. :)